10 Things.

Posted: August 14, 2009 in bitch fit, ironic endings, Life, miarmiar-isms

I don’t know why it always have to be the number 10.

But then since there’s nothing left to do hanging out alone in the house.. dying of some undetected internal infection under my fiance’s watch, I might as well indulge myself to the 10,000 senseless thoughts battling inside my head.

P.S. To my friends.. I have lost contact with for the last 10,000 years.. DON’T WORRY. I’m perfectly fine. I will go back tomorrow by doctor’s appointment for 10,000 more tests that’s going to take god knows how long. It’s nothing really serious, the doctor’s office has this brilliant idea of maxing out my insurance card for a series of radiology and diagnostic evaluations for no reason at all. I have a weird feeling.. this will all end up in some fucked up gastroenteritis diagnosis. A very expensive one.

Ok. So here goes.. while I was watching TABLE FOR THREE this morning, I realized how it can be pretty messy to be the “THIRD PARTY PERSON”, ok for those ofย  you who watched the movie, I know the thought is weird because the flick is not about being the third person in a relationship. Well, not in the literal sense of the phrase, at least.ย  But I guess when something inside you is mysteriously infected.. your brain is somewhat contaminated in a way. So here I am, sitting in front my flatscreen babbling.. bored… wanting to make sense. Ergh.

I’m firing away.

10 Known FACTS why it SUCKS to be the KULASISI.

1. You never get the proper introduction. When you are together out in the public, you always get introduced as the FRIEND, THE OLD ACQUAINTANCE, THE LUNCH BUDDY or any kind of pal that sounds wholesome, THE DRY CLEANER, THE NANNY, THE CREEPY NEIGHBOR, THE SON’S PRINCIPAL.. etc.. etc..

2. YOU ARE THE SECRET. I know it sounds exciting and all but then you realize in the literal sense that you are the secret because you are being hidden to avoid a shatter in a commitment. OUCH. So this means, you date in a secret secluded place probably in a dark alley or someplace like a mafia hideout or whatever. You pass around morse cod-ish messages.. and all that jazz. You get the idea. Be creative. You’ve seen that RICHARD GERE – DIANNE LANE movie by now, I’m sure. Your thoughts?

3. YOU ARE THE APPOINTMENT AFTER THE IMPORTANT HOLIDAYS. Yeah.. always business hours. WITH A CURFEW.

4. Always by appointment, of course. You are not to call that someone and expect that the person will be right in front of your doorstep in a minute after hanging up. A booty call can pass a few times but not always.

5. YOU ARE EXPECTED TO BE UNDERSTANDING AT ALL TIMES. No exceptions.

6. YOU ARE THE SOUNDBOARD. You are suppose to be sensitive, to comfort, cuddle and pamper the person at all times in spite of the facts that you are breakable and that you have your own needs as well.

7. You wear the secret gifts and the secret perfumes. Plus the secret black lingerie. Your uniform. You can’t complain.

8. You cry in the corner feeling exhausted of everything mentioned above. At all times, after your scheduled appointments.

9. You are forbidden to vent your own misery to your family or bestfriend.

10. You are invisible.You cannot materialize. You don’t have any feelings. You don’t exist as someone who has the right to own the person.

… and yet after all the obvious truths.. you go on with the set-up because you are the drama queen and the world is your stage.. and you love the person in a weird twisted kind of way.. or probably..

you’re fucked up just like my neighbor.

Comments
  1. plaridel says:

    i think you’re on the way to recovery. you’re dry sense of humor is coming back.

  2. i think i heard a very loud “POTAH TALAGA SI KELLIE!” here… -beep beep- haha! have you mentioned na being the 3rd party, ur not allowed to feel hurt or disappointed?!๐Ÿ˜€
    kellie!!!! meeeesssyyyuuuu!!!! padalhan kita ng get-well soon card na may kasamang geeepsss.๐Ÿ˜€ isang native na manok, gawin mong tinola para may mainit kang sabaw.๐Ÿ˜€

  3. AC says:

    SAPUL………..

    ang mga 3rd party. hehehee. kala mo ako noh? haha!

    ameshoooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!

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